"Everything I love dies."

"Everything I love dies" is the name of a philosophy I've developed regarding my tastes in television shows. The way the world works, apparently, is that if a show comes out and I start watching it from the beginning, and love it, it will be canceled quickly, usually within one season.

'You're exaggerating,' you say. 'You're bitter about Firefly, like the rest of us, and being melodramatic to prove your point. We get it. Firefly should never have been canceled.'

It's true, I am bitter about Firefly. But I'm also bitter about Birds of Prey, and John Doe, and Commander In Chief, and Century City, and The Tick, and Fastlane, and Studio 60, and Middleman.

See? Everything I love dies.

Some would say that I just have bad taste. I will own that Birds of Prey had moments of truly terrible acting, but come on, Dina Meyer is hot, and you can only watch Super Troopers so many times. But those who dismiss my philosophy out of hand have clearly never seen Middleman. I loved it more than I have loved any other television show in my life. More than Firefly. More than Xena: Warrior Princess. And everything I love dies, and sometimes I feel like weeping, alone, on the floor of my closet, that the 12 episodes of Middleman (which I purchased both on DVD and in iTunes) are all I will ever have of this unappreciated masterpiece of comedy.

Sometimes not even Lacey Thornfield, Confrontational Spoken Word Artist, dancing in her Yellow Teddy Suit can make it better.

But she can try.